Here is a conversation between myself and a girl I know:
me: are you going to the show tomorrow night, Arctic Monkeys 930 club?
didnt even know they were here
me: you just lost like 15 hipster points
it’s a 100 point scale
i’m the ultimate judge
which is pretty hipster of me
maybe someone who is preppy should be the judge
because that would be ironic
Besides displaying my awesome macking skills I think this properly illustrates that I am probably, at least partially, what people think about when they think of hipsters. So go ahead, color me Hipster.
Sidenote: I recently posted on facebook that Sex Bob-omb was my new “favourite” band. It was double reference to Scott Pilgrim vs. The World and The Hives 2001 EP “Your new favourite band.” Yea I was feeling extra pretentious that day.
Side, sidenote: Like how I almost assumed she would know the Arctic Monkeys were in town?
But here is my problem: I’ve been like this since about 2003 before I ever heard the word “hipster.” That’s about the time I started wearing tight clothes and listening to music other than what was on the radio. I really just wanted to look more like the band members I idolized (at this time that was Cedric Bixler-Zavala/Robert Plant).
Then, around 2005, I started hearing about things like “being ironic,” and “indie” music. I also met this guy, we will call Sam, who absolutely infuriated me. Sam was known to wear a shirt with his own name on it and white, thong sandals. He also said stuff like “Their first album was a lot better than their second,” and was one of the first kids I knew to rock a mustache, blerg. He also wore tight pants.
Don’t worry I also fall prey to plenty of my own hipster stereotypes: I have a vinyl collection, I believe in seeing bands on the way up for $15 tickets rather than later for $50 tickets, until recently I had a beard, I like indie films and also think Mean Streets might be better than Taxi Driver…
I guess I just bristle at the idea of being placed in a group like a freaking lemming. I don’t want to be one of those people that ruins previously cool places, like Dan’s Cafe, WHERE THERE WAS ACTUALLY A LINE RECENTLY.
But then again all those aversions make me fall further into the trap. I do also have some anti-hipster qualities: I still like bands after they become popular, I’m really into sports, I work out a lot and I passionately follow politics and international affairs.
I’m not trying to say I started this whole thing, I guess all I’m saying is everyone doing this stuff, whatever it is, just to fit in should just hurry up and go die.